By Kamande
Kigondu and I turned 35 this weekend, and while he was busy on stage performing the magnificent Lwanda Otero, I was wrapping up a meditation retreat. We are grateful for yet another year to make progress and to stay busy being born! Turning 35 is especially interesting for two reasons, it occurred to me:
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In Kenya, reaching 35 officially means we’re no longer considered YOUTH. Goodbye, Youth Fund!
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Gautama the Buddha attained full enlightenment at 35! Here we come, FULL LIBERATION!
Over the years, I’ve kept a collection of quotes and lessons I’ve come across in both digital note apps and books. I thought I’d share 35 that I keep returning to on my journey as reminders. These aren’t original, but I’ve paraphrased and added some commentary over time as I revisit and apply them in my practice and life.
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- It’s okay to be lost sometimes, but we should train ourselves to be aware that we are lost, and not panic. It is only in being lost that we are found.
- Everything can be taken away, apart from the liberty of how you react. This also extends to control – you will always have control over nothing, apart from your response to stimuli. It, however, does not absolve us from responsibility for things you have no control over. Life.
- I share a birthday with Marcus Garvey – you are twice defeated in the battle of life if you have no confidence in self.
- We are entirely responsible for how we feel – no one and nothing makes us feel anything. Happiness and misery, thus, are all internal.
- No matter how much we love and want the best for others, we can only show them the path and walk alongside them. They have to save themselves; we can only liberate ourselves.
- Part of life is balancing the awareness of your cosmic insignificance with your immense importance at a local level. The former builds humility and freedom; the latter drives responsibility and purpose. Nothing, and everything.
- Being Busy is a modern-day myth that we tell ourselves, limiting how much we can do for the world around us.
- Community is very important, especially in this part of the world. Be part of one. Do not walk alone. But also, you would rather walk alone, than with bad company.
- Do the next thing as impeccably as if it will stand the test of time.
- Without health, at any stage of your life, you have very little if anything to work with, if anything at all. Health, then, should be a priority, especially along the variables/levers that you have control over.
- There is nothing on the other side of fear. We suffer more in our imagination and conceptualization than in reality.
- Paraphrasing Feynman – Fall in love with an endeavor and explore it deeply. Nobody ever figures out what life’s all about, and it doesn’t matter, anyway.
- Dying men think of funny things – and that is just what we all are, dying men.
- If I am, death is not. if death is, I am not. Why should I fear that which cannot exist when I do?
- Growth is driven by compounding, which always takes time. Destruction is driven by single points of failure, which can happen in seconds, and loss of confidence, which can happen in an instant.
- With persistence, success can come at any time. However, the persistence and effort have to be balanced by wisdom, so that we are efforting/persisting in the right direction
- Conservative in our behavior, liberal in our tolerance.
- Your best theories are going to be creative guesses, not simple extrapolations.
- Compassion is a VERB. Give. Help. Uplift. Devoid of expectations.
- Once we realize that all our love is selfish, we can start removing the attachment from our love, which continuously reduces our capacity to love purely.
- Life is only perception.
- We see people and things not as they are, but as we are.
- If it is endurable, endure it.
- One moment of kindness is greater than a hundred years of ordinary life. One moment of perfect attention is greater than a hundred years of kindness.
- This is where you’re supposed to be. Marcus Aurelius. “Vile meli inaenda ni kama ndivyo ilifaa kwenda, na kama sivyo, basi meli ingezama.” Nyashinski.
- Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer the negative elements in our life, we don’t sit at home and think about it. We go out and get busy!
- Teach the children to be competent, moral and compassionate.
- Resist even the slightest urge to be cynical.
- At the apex of pain, we find success.
- Everything that we have feared or looked forward to has come and passed. Is there anything to fear or to look forward to?
- The end of meeting is dispersion – we are all in a market, and before long, each of us heads home.
- Love your crooked neighbor with all your crooked heart.
- Treat everyone you meet as an old friend. EVERYONE.
- In the end, what matters will be how much we have developed our love and purity. “We cannot claim victory until our hearts and minds are pure.” Jah9 / Chronixx.
- Impermanence is our only inheritance. EVERYTHING changes. It is all in the process of becoming otherwise. Let go.
May we all generate pure love.
Ps. I’ve been listening (Youtube) to Jack Kornfield and the Grandfather of gratitude, Brother David Steindl-Rast, delve into sacred reflections on death, where Buddha meets Jesus, the power of compassion, the positive side of grief, and beyond. It’s been so nourishing. Brother David’s chanting of Salve Regina at the end has such loving-kindness vibrations.